Raising children with kindness: 10 tips for parents and educators

Raising children does not mean letting them do whatever they want, or punishing them all the time. Research on child development, on which UNICEF and the World Health Organization base their advice, shows that clear limits and warmth help children grow up with confidence.

1. Spend quality time with your child, even 10 minutes a day: play, read, listen to how their day went.
2. Praise effort, not just results: “You worked really hard” rather than “You're so smart.”
3. Set a few clear rules, explain them in simple words, and apply them consistently.
4. Say what you expect rather than what not to do: “Walk slowly” rather than “Don't run.”
5. Stay calm when your child misbehaves. Take a breath before you react.
6. Avoid hitting and humiliation. Physical punishment does not teach good behavior: it teaches fear and makes children more aggressive.
7. Choose logical consequences: if they spill water, they help wipe it up.
8. Name emotions: “I can see you're angry.” A child who understands what they feel learns to control themselves.
9. Set an example. Children copy what we do far more than what we say.
10. Take care of yourself. An exhausted adult finds it harder to stay patient, and asking for help is not a weakness.

A child needs to feel loved in order to learn. Firmness and tenderness are not opposites: they go hand in hand.